What the fuck AM I?!





... tentatively, i am a crocodile space pirate high as fuck on knock-off jenkems, headed for the cold side of the sun in my luminescent red parachute pants.

An Introduction for Every Chapter

It can be terribly easy to remember one's own shortcomings in times of self-reflection.

Selfish desire, fear, hope, pain, acceptance, and spite all seem to dissolve thoroughly into and through each layer of my sentience under the slightest pressure from outside.

I wouldn't trade my life for any; it'd be impossible to really say why. But, for fucks sake, the dance is so sweet. Deeper and shallow after, recycling emotions keep me on my toes.

Gratitude sweeps me off of my feet when its sinks those dusty talons into my shell. I thank you, we thank them, they thank those who provide our sanctuary from the destruction of our coarse hate and endless selfishness. Pulling me back out of contempt, the flowing hands and hips of my tribal shamans. You've saved me.

Smiling again, I cannot resist the joys that do not resist my charisma. Life is hilarious when you squint your eyes just right. I am that giggling fool in the corner of the pub, foaming at the mouth, violently muttering something about 'the righteous qualms of the passionate persuasions' or some other new age horse shit. He is pitiful, and yet... a needle of jealousy threads between my palms as I grasp for the meaning in my own arbitrary existence. We are pitiful....

... and I am no longer simply in love. I am inside the rippling sphere of cherishment, looking out towards my prey, my hopes, my worthy challenges and bitter defeats.

The order is my chaos but we are always in between.

To a Greater Degree; Magma Meditations

The swirling eyes of a chieftess

pierce past my smile, 

penetrating the rhythm

of these hopes and fears, 

leaving a path of fire 

from the tip of my instincts 

down to the core of inhibitions. 

Gravity is suspended for 

the ferocious dance 

between two energies.
~ 

New roots push into 

luscious soils only tilled 

in our wildest dreams. 

I am the surly scorpion 

holding on for dear life 

to the feathered haunches 

of a diving phoenix in its 

destined plummet back towards 

Gaia's open embrace.

Our gaze has broken, and I'm back on Earth; 

A shard of crystallized amber has 

lodged between my shifting eyes;

I dreamed of fire again last night, 

for it cleanses my fear of all hesitation, 

and incinerates my soul.

A Shattering Whimsey

My lonely; 

Her anger's heavy hand. 

Sitting wicked, 

I can't breathe inside my skin.

She cannot hold me again, 

Now my isolation is on fire. 

Left alone, 

We are worthy of no merriment. 

Ragged slime slipping, 

Once again as once before.

She is music, 

I am the beat that's gone askew.